Fred - Is there anywhere near you that molds custom plugs? Basically they place a foam protector in your ear and pump silicone putty in. Better fit impossible.
I have a set that were made for me at the IWA shooting fair in Germany. EAR-Inc (they're a US company) was promo-ing. Thing is they were doing them fast; so were a bit Quick And Chunky in the outer Ear. But they were NOT expensive. The problem with mine is that the part in the outer ear is TOO BIG and can just rub the helmet padding. But it's an option.
Short fat ear canals - I would (if I were you) try a set of the MAN-SIZE Flare Isolates. Aluminium ones. You can always give them to your better half if they don't fit. And if you find the metal part a bit big - they'll easily turn down smaller! - Turning down Titanium ones a bit more awkward.
SIZE GUIDE